Weekend reading

This week in Family Lines Lucy tries to get information about Deb's whereabouts from her sister's strange friend, Mirror.

24 June 1980

Ma didn’t believe my story about tripping and banging my head so after she’d bathed the eye and rubbed arnica into the bruise there was a lot of music to face and it wasn’t ‘Hello Dolly’. Come Friday I was sick of it and when I spotted Mirror in the yard after school I asked her to come to McDonalds with me.

 She’d been on my mind ever since she called round with your other friends. I was sure she knew more than she was saying. After all, she was your best friend, although I never got why. Seemingly she sang dumb when the cops came with their questions – not that I blame her. Her Ma said she had laryngitis and couldn’t talk. Poor Mirror had to go around croaking for a week.

  When I called her in the yard she gave a start and twisted her head this way and that until I reassured her we weren’t being followed. Then she looped her arm in mine, the way she used to do with you. How did you stick it? I walked behind her, I walked in front of her, I walked around her but wherever I was that arm followed me, like a puppy’s lead.

  Once we were sitting in Mac’s I got a good look at her. Or at her mask. The pancake was thicker than ever and the eyeliner and mascara made her look like a panda. Worst of all were her eyes, I couldn’t see into them. It was like talking to someone wearing shades. You’re trying to look into their eyes but all you see is two blank screens. She fidgeted too, non-stop, pulling and wrenching the neck of her top till I thought it would unravel. She said she didn’t want anything to eat, only ordered a coffee then ate half my chips so I had to get another round of them.

In between the chips and the sips of coffee she was chewing a wad of gum, taking it out of her mouth and wrapping it up to eat or drink then popping it back in her mouth. Then she lit up a fag. Just watching her made me nervous. But it was only when she began to talk that I realised she’s not just weird she’s off the fucking wall.

  So how’s it going Miriam? I started gently.

  She shrugged. Okay. No great shakes, you know.

  Yeah, tell me about it.

  Yeah, you know.

  (I’m reporting this word for word so that you can see what I mean!)

  Any news of Deb? I ploughed on.

  She stared at me, at least I think she did but it was hard to tell with those eyes. Then she asked me Have you got a fella, Lucy?

  She knew how to touch a nerve, I’ll give her that.

  That depends what you call a fella, I said.

  Ha ha, yeah. They’re only gobshites going around here.

  You could sing that if you had an air to it, as my Nanna used to say.

  I can’t sing. She looked crestfallen.  

  Me neither. I decided to cut the crap and head for the juggler. So why don’t you answer my question, Mir? Do you know anything about Deb? Or where she might be? I won’t rat you out, I swear.

  She pulled back in her seat and whipped her head around like the girl in The Exorcist.

  It’s okay Mir, I reassured her. There’s no one listening.

  After a couple of moments she relaxed a little and leaned across the table towards me. I craned forward until our noses almost touched.

  I know where she is, she mouthed, her teeth showing yellow against the white make-up.

  For real? I almost shouted. Why didn’t you say so before now?

  She pressed a finger to her lips, then whispered America.

  Shit, I sat back. Are you sure? I didn’t think she had that much money.

  She was spotted. By a talent scout.

  Fuck this, the girl was wired to the moon. Or stoned. Or both.

  Oh yeah? I humoured her to see where this would lead.

  She nodded solemnly. Right here.

  Spotted for what?

  The movies, I s’pose. She tilted her head and went all dreamy for a moment. That must be amazing, she said, like she was talking to herself. Hollywood.

  Debbie goes to Hollywood, as a fantasy it beat being kidnapped or going on the missions but it didn’t convince me. I’m not sure I’m buying this, Mir, I said. I mean, Deb never said she wanted to be an actress. The only one who’s stage struck in our house is our Ma.

  Don’t say I told you. She looked serious for a moment then giggled and popped the gum back in her mouth.

  Jasus Miriam, what the fuck are you on? I exploded.

  On air, she nearly broke herself laughing, at her own joke!

  I wanted to scream. There was no getting through to her. I don’t know what her problem is but it’s serious. All the same I can’t help feeling she knows something and she’s afraid to tell.  This was pointless. I stood up and said I had to go home.

  Me too, she said.

  The place was filling up and she hooked my arm again as we made to leave. This time I didn’t try to shake it off.

  At the door we collided with a bunch of fellas coming in. One stood back but the other two pushed past us. Mirror’s arm tensed in mine. Her fear spread like a magnetic wave over me, giving me goosepimples. I glanced at her face and saw that her jaw was working double time. Suddenly I felt afraid for her.

  She didn’t speak again until we were half way down the mall. Yeah, Deb, I miss her, she said, sounding normal for the first time that afternoon. You’re strong like her, she added. I feel safe with you.

  Strong. I could have cracked when she said that. I wanted to tell her that inside I’m crying. Maybe I look stronger than I am. Or is it because I’m big that people think I’m tough? What about you, Sis? Are you surviving alone without us? Running to a new a life? I hope so. But you could at least send us a postcard to let us know you’re alive.

  I walked home with Mirror. I’d never seen her house before. With its navy door and window frames and the white hoops surrounding the grass patch in front it looked a bit like a garda station.

  See you Miriam, I said and squeezed her arm quickly.

  Yeah, yeah, she pulled away quickly, spat the gum into the gutter and ran around the side of the house.

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I hope you’re enjoying the story so far! Lots more to come. Next time Lucy and Ma visit a fortune teller. Let me know what you think of Family Lines here: